They don’t make ‘em like they used to

TomKat (or Kato or Tomatie as I prefer)? Bennifer I and II? Bragina? Will And Jada Smith, John and Kelly Travolta? Demi and Ashton? Mike and Catherine? Is this really the best powermatching Hollywood can do?

The best couple I’ve heard in ages was the short-lived fabled Tom Cruise/Rob Thomas hookup.  I would have actually been excited if it were true. In the light of the ubiquitous power celebrity couples with absolutely no heat or chemistry, I was recently waxing nostalgic for the time when I actually cared about celebrity matchups and had idols who seemed like their love was pure and true, and fed my fantasy that I too would one day briefly find the one true love of my life and then we would be tragically be ripped apart by cruel forces beyond our control and our even greater passion for our art.   (give me a break, I was 13 at the time, and just flexing my drama queen skills.  It’s a wonder I didn’t wind up writing Harlequin novels.  Seriously, though can you even begin to picture a romance novel based on Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes.  Where they actually end up with each other, I mean?)

So in good old fashioned dear diary style:

My favorite celeb couples and -er- hook-ups: (I’ve got to stop watching VH-1 and the E! channel.)

Joanne Woodward and Paul Newman

Yeah it’s an obvious and easy choice. She’s stunning, he’s gorgeous, even at, what are they now, 100 years old?  They are celebrated talents, contributors to charity and the theatre arts and dance. They’ve been together for eons and they still seem to have a healthy sense of humor about life and each other.  If they are not as good as they look, well, I don’t care and I don’t want to know.

Joni Mitchell and Graham Nash

They lived in Laurel Canyon in the heady sixties and were angsty and poet-y and placed flowers in vases by freshly lit fires while listening to each other’s love songs written only for them.

I think I feel faint.

Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton

I don’t care how many men Taylor married, I only count the 2 times she married Ricard Burton. And the 69.42 karat mega-lith? Not pink.  Now that’s a man who knows how to buy mega bling.

Katherine Hepburn and Spencer Tracy

Tess: I was kind of hoping you might like to kiss me goodbye.

Sam:  I was kind of hoping you’d ask.

Good enough to make it my favorite screen kiss of all time. Watching Hepburn breathlessly walk into the door afterwards gets me everytime.  Can’t say I blame her.

Ruby Dee and Ossie Davis

I think they might actually beat out Newman and Woodward.

Anne Bancroft and Mel Brooks

See? No couches were harmed.

Laurie Anderson and Lou Reed

© Guido Harari

Quite possibly the coolest couple ever.

Madonna and Sean Penn

Yeah, they’re both huge tools now (and probably were then) but at least they were fun to watch.

Iman and David Bowie

I wouldn’t even care if they didn’t like each other. They look otherworldly together.

Gilda Radner and Gene Wilder

True dysfunctional geek love

Batman and Catwoman

Yeah so they’re not real. But they should be. Vicky who?